A few words from the other side

Dario Phong

Hi dear reader. Here I'm, occasionally, writing for Hugi. It's quite interesting thinking about who can be reading this article, don't you think. I can reckon two groups of people: those who know me directly, have read my articles, or have seen my intros. And on the other side those who do not know my name at all. To both of them, however, I want to say: "Hi from the other side!"

Yeah, I'm on the other side now. Not in the demoscene anymore. You might say I have a life. But I don't think that's fair nor correct. I have always had one, I have just changed my hobbies and the things I focus on.

I was reading Hugi, and suddenly I had a Déjà-vu (French words which mean that you are doing something you feel you have done in the past), I thought I was a demoscener again, and that I was focused again on that strange hobby of ours. There wasn't any tear on my face, but there was a little pain in my heart. The feeling of something that is gone and will never be back. Just like childhood. It was a stage of your life. It was beautiful and good. But it's good. And you can't refrain from feeling a little melancholy, and some sadness in the bottom of your heart.

But it's gone. Here I'm now, smoking a cigarette (actually I don't have anything better) thinking about my friends, my studies, and all the parties I have enjoyed. Looking at the clothes I now wear. And thinking about the little "bad" things that I've done. It's quite funny sitting at the end of the road and looking back. Then you are able to understand. Still you are amazed at all that you walked. By all the stones and rivers that you found in your way. It's a feeling that makes you smile. But in fact your heart does smile.

As I told I understand now. But not everything. I still can't understand the road I'm now following. Ah, by the way I recommend that you follow that wise Chinese proverb (I did not find it in any fortune's cookie ;-): If you want to know the road ahead ask those coming.

Oh, shit, I can't still write as clearly as I would. All the fucking ideas together. Without any link but the one in my brain (quite a weird thing how our brain works [Watch! can you see now how many different ideas I link? ;-))]). Well, I was thinking about what made me write this article. It was a reference in one article by Chris Dragan. It mentioned compression and me. It's quite funny how you can influence people in one direction. I hope I did influence you in the right direction, not in the right direction for the ds, but rather for you. But don't misunderstand me. I'm not here to tell you what to do. I'm just here to tell you what I did.

I think I helped somewhat to promote writing, compressing and coding. E-) Just kidding. I think I made a little, but still important, influence to change some points of view. And I hope it did help. Otherwise, I beg you pardon me. Because then, I innocently thought that the important thing was the ds. Now I've realized that it is demo sceners instead. People like you.

And that's because I want to use these lines, which probably will go unread, misunderstood, or forgot, to tell what I think that the future of the ds should, or could, be. I think we should think how the ds can help people, not how people can help the ds. And I believe, due to my experience, that it should help to evolve people's knowledge, art, way of thinking and way of communicating.

Different areas there are. Music: musicians should find in the ds a place to increase and tune their knowledge about music, in an artistic way, and also in a technical way, to make them ready for the future.

Gfx: they should increase their skills, and develop their own style, not focusing on the ds but rather on what's, not outside, but in the rest of the world (because the ds is just a little part of this big (and weird) world [that's probably because the ds is weird as well]).

Coding: here it's where there's more room for improving. Coding helps to make good programmers, and good students. I think they should, or could, [just as I did] understand it as a whole, starting by the minimum fact which makes sense to them. Let me explain. I loved coding. Then I saw maths as programming, that helped me to understand and appreciate it. Then I saw physics as more practical maths, more related to programming, and I liked it more. Then I saw technical drawing as graphics programming, and I therefore enjoyed it more and thus improved on it. Then taking the three I understood the concept of studying. And then I could study more clearly anything. It doesn't have to be that way for you, not that road, but that map. I realized from my experience [and that, like everything, could be wrong] that everything is the same, and that everything is different. Is that a paradox? of course not. It's just something to think about.

The last paragraph is gone, and you may have missed something: writing. It was intentional, I admit. Some say that experts in a field become so egocentric that they see everything from the point of view of that field. And the fact is that I think that writing, apart from an art and a science itself, should be the factor that links everything together. Coders, musicians, and graphicians can and should write. In that case you can distinguish two kinds of articles: those of opinion and those of teaching. Both are important for the correct developing of everything, including the ds. Teaching makes it evolve. And showing opinions favours greatly the right (or wished) evolving of it. But don't overdo on any of them. Too many teaching without a critical factor makes the tree grow incorrectly. And too much criticism without teaching gives no growing at all.

I hope you are not lost with the metaphors, they are intended to help, not to obscure it. But nevertheless I think they are important because they help to relativize it. Both for you and me. I'm not planning how it should develop, that's not my task, it's yours indeed, I'm just putting the seeds of the tree that you have to take care of. I'm just giving you a feeling of should it be (or how could it be, I'm quite skeptical nowadays [though skepticism is a slow suicide]).

And what do I have to tell you from the other side, apart from telling you what to do? OE-) Well, I'm enjoying my life as much as I can. But still I feel the same with my current real life that with my old life: I always give more than get. Ok, I might need a shrink. But it's a feeling I've always had. So let me give a little advise: when you get, give. You may have got the idea, if you haven't you are probably not ready yet. Though I've learned over the ages that no one is totally right, and that you should follow your way, and not theirs. Nevertheless I think giving advice is good, unless for the fact you may get an answer. ;-)

And that's all for now, what was supposed to be a few words, has grown up to 7k, and they have accomplished their goal. Which was not teaching you something, but rather spending some time because I couldn't get to sleep. Remember what I told about relativizing? In that case you learnt something. Otherwise I hope that was the seeds for new human knowledge.

Good luck with your life, whatever it involves. But remember that luck does not exist, you've to make it all! And hardly anyone will be there to help you. In fact there are no teachers, just students. So learn. Everything is good for that matter, the first lights of sunshine, your last conversation with your mates, and the last arguments you had. Learn, before it's too late, so late that you can't even realize that you have not learned at all.

I won't be there either. For you who know me, and had some relationship with me, never forget I'll carry you in the bottom of my heart. And for those who did not, think that I'm sad we couldn't share opinions.

Dario Phong, or what is left of him.
Barcelona, 27-March-2001