Thorn In The Heart
Written by Psychic Symphony
Yes, you guessed right, it's just another story of a broken heart.
Things happen fast and you don't realize what is happening, before you notice you have the desire to meet her, to be sure if she is indeed what you have been searching for your whole life. It doesn't really matter if she really is or not, you don't lose anything by getting to know her.
So you go without fear of what may lay in front. And when you finally are convinced of your feelings, when you start to believe that nothing could be more true and perfect. That it seems like one of those stories you see on the movies of the perfect girl who has also been waiting for you like you have been waiting for her your whole life.
Well... The problem is she wasn't waiting for you. She already found the one she was looking for and you end up looking like a desperate idiot. Back into depression and wondering what the hell you're doing with your life. All the words she said before she told you she already has a boyfriend seem to echo. They fit so right. Everything seems to link to you, the music playing on the radio, the words of the two old ladies talking on the BUS.
A new sunrise comes, a new hope blooms. A new day has started... time to go to bed I guess. Meaningless stuff I have to do tommorow.
Stop thinking so much they say.
Stop looking desperate and playing the victim they say.
You aren't the only one like that out there. You don't like your life? Change it. They say...
When you look depressed all words make sense but they don't make you change.
You still feel depressed on the inside but at least you pretend you aren't so they can leave you alone and don't think you are stupid. But you are. You feel stupid. You feel cheated. By society, by them, by your parents, by everyone who didn't warn you about it. Everything seems to be against you. From the dog that won't stop barking to the wind that feels cold when you're staring at another sunrise.
Staring at another sunrise before going to bed.
"I only hope I'll feel better and normal tomorrow."
After a couple of months even feeling depressed is boring. Everything seems boring and meaningless. Studying, working, walking, eating, sleeping, bathing. Everything seems so futile... You wish you could just stop thinking about all these things and be normal. Are the normal people normal? Do they think too? It comes to a point where you realize they are normal, they are just like you... They also have doubts. They also think too much. But they have a difference, they have already discovered that thinking doesn't change anything. So they go on their daily business with hope in search of a goal, instead of wasting their time wondering why they are living.
I drawn a conclusion out of this... "I think, therefore I am." It is not true. When you start thinking you cease to be you. You are the one inside. You cannot belong to a society and be alone. And you NEED the society, for more that it seems you don't, you always do. You will just die if you don't use and explore the society.
Just live.
- Psychic Symphony / Evolve / Frequency