Review of the Fart Music-Disk "Fart5" by White

Written by Makke

I've just had a totally new experience in... uhm... audio. I've... uhm... listened to the Fart music(?!)-disk "5". The thing is... I just don't get it! I don't get this music(?!!!!!!). When I was listening to the disk I turned my volume up to maximum, like I always do when I review disks. That's the signal to my parents that I'm reviewing, and don't want to be disturbed. Usually they don't bother me when I do this, however today my dad came in and asked, "What the hell is that noise?"

"I'm reviewing a music-disk", I replied.

"Music-disk?! I thought music-disks containined music!" was the answer. Then he asked me to turn it down. I did. My mom and dad usually let me listen really high on all metal-songs, all rave-songs, all funk, hip-hop, reggae, classical, punk-songs I can find. But this one was torture.

I consider myself as a true music phreak that can listen to almost everything. But this disk... this... evil disk almost destroyed my goddamn ears! I DON'T GET THIS, so called, MUSIC!!!

Let me try to describe the songs...

Saba the Android.

In the info file to the disk it said:

"10 pAtS bY KAz = REmIXED by WhITE, ALL THe ReST -- OriGINal By WhItE!"

Ok, so this one is partially a remix. To start with it's a 4 channel mod. This song can best be described as a highly sophisticated wave of sounds, which sometimes can actually be mistaken for music. The music that makes it through the wave sounds pretty good, but it drowns in all the noise... Sorry, don't get it!

Experimunte III - bY WHiTE aND sWalLOW oF doOmSdAY

The beginning is great! Like a true synth-ballad... but then THE RETURN OF THE DREADED WAVE OF SOUNDS appears. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! My soul hurts! How can you do this to a song that could actually be good?!! Man. The wave is brutally out of tune and doesn't seem to carry any beat. You can actually hear some pretty good song in the background struggling to be heard, but the wave is too strong! NEXT!

Follow the saba - oRiG bY kB, rEmIxED bY WhITE!

The wave is not so strong in this one. Actually this one sounds pretty good from time to time. And there are some really... uhm... interesting lyrics. If I ever make out what they actually say I'll write a new article about JUST that. Sigh, next...

Helikopter - OrIgInAL BY WHiTE!

This one is probably the best song on the disk. A very interesting song built up by b-drums, zap-sounds and sometimes a sawtooth bass. As the title states... this one sounds like a helicopter. It's quite interesting. I like it actually. But music? Aaah... well. It's not up to me what you want to call music...

Intro - OrIgInAL BY WHiTE!

Intro-song to the disk. Once again, this can be mistaken for music. This module actually has some melody.

Suba Control 4.5 - oRiG bY nECRoS, RemIxED By WhITE!

Sounds good at the beginning (something tells me that this part was spared from re-mixing and is the original work of Necros)... then somebody went crazy on it. Like if a 5-year-old was sent to finish a painting by Michelangelo or Van Gogh.

Oldmularitie - OrIG By BaCtER (sMuCHtER) rEmIxED bY whItE!

Nothing to add...

Siho's theme - OrIgInaL By WHiTE!

MAKE IT STOP! PLEASE!!!

Yassin's theme - OrIGINal BY WhItE!

NO! Not the WAVE OF SOUNDS AGAIN!!!

I don't know how to sum this up! Whether it's just me who doesn't know how to react to this kind of music, or if it totally sucks, both in technique and musicwise. The whole disk is an orgy in portamento.

Well, an extra bonus for originality I guess. I've never heard anything like this in my life. So I guess the download wasn't totally in vain.

- Makke/Visuale/Hugi/Trebel

Comment by Adok: I LOVE this truely experimental kind of music.