Caption compo, the revenge! (From the "Oh look, we've got some entries!" department)Anything that begs some form of reader interaction in diskmags is usually onto a loser in my experience. The phrase "It's what YOU want it to be!" usually causes a mass hasty clicking of mouse buttons on the dialogue box labelled 'IGNORE', to take the readership to a less embarrassing article instead.
However, this is Hugi, the audience are bigger than most, and in response to my carelessly posed caption competition from the last issue, out of those untold hundreds and thousands, there are a couple of brave souls who actually wrote in and tried their hand at witty captioneering. Did I mention beforehand that there were no prizes? I hope I did??
Any, just to refresh all your brains, here's the original picture of the Ryanair 'convertible' special....
First out of the gates is Thiemo Maettig (mados/TAP), a loud cheer goes to you!
"Hi, here's my caption for your competition in Hugi 31: 'Who cares about aerodynamics?'"
And then, we have Chris Thornborrow, who has splattered us with a veritable jism-pile of entries. Damn, could have used a more wholesome metaphor just now, sorry about that mate!
"* Announcing the all-new GPU cooling system
* "Yeah, I know we are going to die, but just for the sake of argument, how many polygons do you reckon it would take to render that?"
* A new fad was running through Boeing engineers: plane-case modding
* "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Would the Borg in row 34 please refrain from assimilating the plane until *after* we land?"
* "I'm telling you Frank the engine demo scene has gone to hell. Old Skool props were so much better!"
* "The engines didnae tek it Cap'n!"
* "I'm telling you Ms Foster, we've looked, and your son is not in the engine housing."
* "If that bloody flying demon shows up once more I'm getting a picture."
* "These X-ray glasses are amazing!"
* "Miss, oh miss, is that normal?" "Perfectly sir. Can I get you something to drink before we crash?"
* "Would everyone remain calm. Yes that is an Intel processor in the engine."
* "No, we are not running windows."
* "Should we need to divide by two, the emergency lights will illuminate and oxygen masks will drop in front of you."
* Fists with your toes...
* If planes were 4k demos..."
Yep, I think that makes it loud and clear!
Finally, here's TAD's suggestion which arrived in July 2006:
"It was clear to all the passengers that the pilot was a true scener who loved transparent cases and showing off his new 3d engine."
And to keep this grisly tableau on the road, here's this issue's sectionable captionable picture! You know how it works now, so off you go!
"Maybe if I don't drink so much at Breakpoint this year, I won't be sick?! - Damn, too late!"Collected by CiH - Hugi Mag, Jan '06 / Jul '06